Inventory

2010 July 24
by wrongshoes

We are living in our new, rented house in the mountains.

The baby is almost six months old, and interacts completely differently from the way his older brother did as a baby. He does share his brother’s inability to settle down and fall asleep, though.

Husband is working full time.

I am with the kids full time.

No plans to enroll the five year old in kindergarten this fall. He’s been attending a “social skills group” for kids on the autism spectrum. The other kids in his group are similar to him, with diagnoses of Asperger’s and PDD-NOS.  He has still never been evaluated or diagnosed, but it’s clear that he fits right in with the other boys.

I’ve been struggling to find a community here, in our new city. The home schoolers appear to be mostly religious, which I’m not. They haven’t said anything directly, though, so we still show up at park days sometimes. We did make friends with a mom/boy from the social skills class, so I’m hopeful. It helps that our boys get along, and that we both have experience with similar parenting challenges.

I’m struggling to keep up with domestic responsibilities. I spend much of my time trying to soothe the baby to sleep by wearing him on my body, and sitting with him on my body as he naps. The five year old demands the rest of my time, it seems. I squeeze in cooking and cleaning here and there - just enough to keep things livable. I don’t know when I’ll ever have time to write. Maybe I can do it while the baby is napping on me.

Moving

2010 April 3
by wrongshoes

We are moving to a new state in one week.

I have an eight week old baby.

My five year old seems more like an Aspie than ever, though he’s excited about the move.

All the furniture is being loaded tomorrow. We will be living in an empty house until we fly away.

Coming Up for Air

2010 February 11
by wrongshoes

I had the baby the other day. I’m feeling a bit like I can explore blogging again. I was hyper-focused on the pregnancy and birth, and now I’m done with those. Of course, I’m a bit distracted by the little creature my body produced, so we’ll see what happens.

Just wanted to say hello again to those of you that are still out there.

Coming February 2010

2009 August 3
by wrongshoes

baby2sm

BlogHer ‘09

2009 July 27
by wrongshoes

I stood at the BlogHer ‘09 registration counter and waited.

“I just want to be sure I’ve looked everywhere before we write a name tag out for you,” the friendly registration lady said before another friendly person came up to chat with her.

I waited some more.

I wasn’t even upset that I had to wait, but the large amounts of money I paid when I registered five months ago did cross my mind. My first impression was not good, but I was happy to be there anyway. I was feeling optimistic. I just wasn’t impressed… yet.

The swag bag. That will impress me. People mentioned the wonderful swag. They said I should bring an extra suitcase to take all the fabulous prizes home with me. Oh, I’m being silly. I don’t really care about the stuff. I’m here to listen and learn. But I do love presents! The swag will be fun.

“Okay, so write your name on this blank name tag. I’ll give you a thingy to put it in, and then you can take it over to that counter and they’ll give you a thingy to hang it on. They’ll also give you a swag bag there.”

Things were finally moving along. I walked over to the next counter and showed them my makeshift name tag. Another nice lady said, “Here’s the thingy to hang it on, but we don’t have any more swag bags. We just ran out. I don’t know that we’ll be getting any more, but you can keep checking back and ask for one if you see some on this table back here.”

No swag bag. But that’s not what I’m here for. It’s okay, I didn’t really want a bunch of random junk anyway. But still… not impressed.

The breakout sessions I went to the first day were moderately interesting and useful. I was there to listen and learn, and there was plenty to listen to. I enjoy sitting and listening, especially to people who seem to know something I don’t. I enjoyed the first day. It was good. Good, but not impressive.

I managed to make an acquaintance during a breakout session on day two, so I didn’t have to sit alone at lunch that day. Honestly, everyone I met was very friendly and nice, and I never felt totally alone, even when I didn’t know anyone. I felt happy to be in the company of so many creative and interesting people, but it was nice to kind of know someone at lunch.

When I was done eating, I reviewed the session schedule. My acquaintance planned to go to a geek lab, but I really wanted to go to a break out session. There were two that I thought looked interesting.

  • “International Activists BlogHer Scholarship Winners Share Their Work” sounded noble and profound. That was the session I should attend, I thought.
  • “Women Writing in the Age of Britney: Pop Culture & Gossip & Femenisty Stuff, Oh My” sounded like it could potentially be thought provoking, and plus, there would be famous bloggers on the panel. I thought it was my duty to try to catch at least a little bit of the BlogHer drama I read about last year. Also, it might be funny.

Both were in the same hallway, so I decided to walk by the Britney session to check it out, and then decide. By the time I got there, people were overflowing from the room into the hallway. It was standing room only. “They should have put this session in a bigger room,” I heard someone complain. Yeah, kind of odd that they’d put such a popular session in such a tiny room… or was it? Maybe they were trying to encourage people to choose different sessions?

Considering my fear of making physical contact with strangers, I headed back down the hallway to the Activists session. The large room was practically empty - definitely more my speed. I found a seat surrounded by empty chairs, just like I like them.

It didn’t take long for me to become entirely un-self-absorbed when the panel began to speak about crimes against women, racism, helping their communities, government censorship, poverty, child labor, and many other meaningful topics I try hard to avoid, preferring the comfort of a suburban middle-class life of denial.

But these women from other countries, other cultures, were so beautiful and so easy to connect with. They told their stories and talked about trying to make the world a safe place for everyone to live in, one blog post at a time.

Suddenly I realized why I haven’t been blogging for the past few months. Because my life is meaningless, without purpose. I don’t have a reason to write.

The moderator asked for audience questions. A brave woman took the microphone, voice quivering, and said (I paraphrase), “I wanted to express thanks to all of you, who are amazing women doing amazing work. I’m sitting here crying because of the work you do. You give meaning to blogging, and I really hope the organizers of BlogHer will consider having the international activists speak in the ballroom next year because everyone needs to hear these stories, and the only reason I’m here right now is that there was nowhere to sit in the Britney room, and that’s ridiculous.”

Yeah, that. And applause. And more applause.  And tears.

Finally, I couldn’t have been more impressed. I hope they post this session online, because it was amazing.

Blogher

2009 July 17
tags:
by wrongshoes

Anyone going to Blogher next week? I am, but will be taking the train from WI each day unless I can somehow come up with a spare $400 for lodging at the Sheraton. Or, know any other good hotels nearby that are cheaper and still decent?

Phoebe in Wonderland

2009 June 30
by wrongshoes

Just watched Phoebe in Wonderland on Netflix and wanted to recommend it. I love the way it handled mental disorder and unschooling themes (the unschooling theme may have been entirely inadvertent). Oh, there was even a mother guilt theme, another of my favorites.

In other news, I’ve practically dropped out of the bloggysphere. I keep thinking I’ll jump back in, but so far it hasn’t happened. I really can’t explain it at all. I did have an idea for a blog, but I’ve been lazy. Sigh.

Article: Questions about Prenatal Ultrasound and the Alarming Increase in Autism

2009 June 6
by wrongshoes

Questions about Prenatal Ultrasound and the Alarming Increase in Autism

Cubbys Day in Court

2009 June 1
by wrongshoes

From writer John Elder Robison, about his son:
Cubbys Day in Court

You left high school because you didn’t have any friends, didn’t you! The prosecutor shouted baseless accusations at Cubby, her face twisted in a venomous mask. What was wrong with her, I wondered? Cubby answered calmly. No, he said. I left because I was bored with the classes. I have lots of friends. I wanted to take college courses. Behind him, the court was packed with his supporters who gave silent lie to her words.

The new me

2009 May 27
by wrongshoes

I think I have a concept for a new blog. I think. I just wanted to let you know it’s simmering…